Is being “normal” — whatever that means to you — a good thing, or a bad thing? Neither?
I spent much of my childhood wanting, wishing, and praying to be just that. Normal. I would cry as I fell asleep at night: I want to be just like everyone else. I want to be normal! I would scream. But over these past few years, I have realized that I do not wish to be normal. I live my life wishing to be noticed, wishing to stand out and to have everyone I surround myself with see a special quality within me.
“Normal” in my mind used to hold such a great significance. People who were “normal” had easy lives. They did not stress over school work, did not have brains that worked 10,000 miles an hour, did not think about pink unicorns dancing on rainbows. The normal kids were the kids who identified with peers on the playground, wanting to talk about the latest celebrity gossip and about boys and games they liked to play. No, I never saw myself as normal. I was the one who was interested in everything puberty and pregnancy when I was in elementary school. I had aspirations to become a CIA/FBI spy. I wanted to interpret for the UN. I wanted to make the Junior Olympic swim team. I wanted to make it to the Scripps National Spelling Bee. I scared people away from me. I was different. I saw the world in a different light.
Normal? I was not normal.
But would I want to be “normal” now?
I see normal now as someone who is fine with being safe and having predictability in this world. They wake up in the morning, go to work, come home, eat dinner, and go to sleep. We would describe this person as the average American [or Taiwanese, or fill-in-the-blank nationality] person. I desire adventure in my life. If, on the way to work, I saw a dog adoption fair going on, I’d want to run to adopt a dog. I want to go on adventures in my mind (and with other people). I like spontaneity.
Normal, I feel, no longer carries a negative or positive connotation. Some days, I do still wish to be normal–whatever that may be. But I realize, my passion for life is what makes me stand out. I think to myself: Do I really want to do what 90% of the people in this world are doing? Not really!
Amanda's Experience 